1) Prioritise yourself - your own physical and mental health - give yourself some free treats
Ask yourself 'What do I want to do now?' and do it. If you're at work then take a few deep breaths, take a ten minute break or plan something nice for your lunch break. If you're looking after someone else- can you get some fresh air? If you're at home - then plan a nice breakfast, then lunch for yourself, then dinner. It could be that you are just having a bad day. If so, then give yourself plenty of free treats and reassure yourself that tomorrow will be better. If you don't know what your 'free treats' are - now might be the right time to write a list, here's some of mine; lip salve, hand cream, hand massage, cup of tea, meditation, yoga, deep breathing, writing cards, writing lists, facebook time, twitter time, stroke a pet, phone a friend, read a good book, look at old photos, plan a break/holiday, count your blessings - five amazing things, text a friend with some good news, watch your favourite programme on TV, listen to favourite music, tidy your desk. Realise everybody's different. Your list may be completely different. Write your list and stick it on your fridge. Mark the day out of ten too, this way you can see there are patterns you can address - and see yourself gradually getting better. Remember tomorrow is another day!
2) Ask for help - from friends, family and professionals
Write lists of the people you can ask for help for at 9-5 times - the professionals, retired/homemaker friends and family, and lists of the people you can ask for help 'out of hours' at the weekend or after 5pm. When in doubt, ring the people on your lists - the people who have helped before will help again. If no-one's helped you before and you are ill with it, then ring your GP. It's best to be specific - try to break down what might be overwhelming you into discrete problems. Tackle these problems one at a time with the professionals, who can help you prioritise. Something as simple as getting an appointment may clear the imaginary log jam that's preventing you from getting on and doing the stuff you want to do. When someone's helped you - even on the phone, write down their name and a list of all the other people that have helped you recently - it will be useful to look back on it in the months to come when you may need more help with another problem.
3) Plan a meditation session. You may not even have the motivation to do this right now, but perhaps plan a session for when you get up tomorrow - just one yoga move or Tai Chi move for example will help ground you and remind you of the joys of being alive. Or you could plan a session before bed time - just lie down, close your eyes and concentrate on the spot just above your forehead, breathe deeply and count to ten saying calm on your out breath. A great one if you're having problems sleeping too.
4) Forgive yourself. Imagine yourself walking along a misty beach - perhaps one you know. I imagine Harlech beach in Wales. You see someone walking towards you along the beach.
You realise it is you - you are wearing the same outfit you are now. Give yourself a big hug and say 'I forgive you' to yourself. Feel yourself smiling at this ridiculous thing you are forgiving yourself for. Even reading this paragraph you will have gone through this visualisation in your head and it really works. You deserve another free treat.
Friday, November 29, 2013
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