Monday, October 09, 2006

'I wanna help - for the sake of the kids'

Jeremy Kyle has just persuaded some youngster to carry on talking on his programme with this comment. The other lady on the platform accused her of being an 'unfit mother'. The ultimate insult.

Surely it's more like 'I wanna interfere - for the sake of the ratings.'

I'm doing anything to avoid ringing the mortgage solicitors who have written a complicated letter. We know about two thousand solicitors - friends and relatives - but too hungover yesterday to contact any of them.

So now, here I am watching Jeremy Kyle, thinking about the state of the nation's teeth (the family on the platform are quite handsome bar the teeth). Anyway at least some member of my family hasn't asked me to go on Jeremy Kyle. What would I say? I'd politely decline. I'd probably use cancer as an excuse 'Yes, I'd love to go on the Jeremy Kyle show, but my cancer treatment might make it a bit difficult'. I'd rather talk to solicitors than that. They're not as critical as Jeremy Kyle. Every programme he says 'That is wrong'. How does he know? Is he God?

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